CFB Thursday Night Lox: Heisman Frontrunner Joe Milton looks to start on a high note

September 1, 2022

Week 0 was fun. Had some bad games and then we got to hear about Scott Frost all week. Funniest thing I heard was Ryen Russillo saying this about Frost:

“Scott Frost being bad at coaching football is like if Superman had a lisp, it just doesn’t make sense. No offense to those of you with lisps, we’re all rooting for you”

I think that’s the perfect way to sum up week 0 in college football. But thank goodness we’re in week 1 now fr fr. To really get the season going we got a great slate of games and the fellas are ready to hit someone. More important than anything else tho we’ve got the Tennessee Volunteers getting their season going which means we get to watch the greatest QB in the country play tonight. Joe Milton, the floor is yours.

BACKYARD BRAWL: PITT VS WVU +7.5

Mountaineer Country, let’s ride

These schools that lie 70 miles apart (crazy) don’t play for a trophy they just play because they hate eachother. So much so that this will be the 105th rendition of this game. Think of this as the Iron Bowl in September and both teams are mid but they just really hate eachother. That’s what we get tonight. And in a time where people in college football seem to hate things like geography and traditions, what better way to kick the (real) season off? 2 USC transfer qb’s also will make this game sick as they’re both pretty good and will likely be in the league next year. I’m taking the mountaineers solely because this is a rivalry game and there’s not much that separates these teams so why not ride with the dog?

TENNESSEE -35.5 VS BALL STATE

Joe Milton high school highlight

Sorry David Letterman, your alma mater will be the first of few to succumb to Joe Milton and the Vols this year. Josh Heimlich will prove why Tennessee hired him this year as he continues their long history of teams having lofty expectations and then ending the season 7-5. That’s what makes college football beautiful. That along with a guy like Joe Milton who does not start but everyone knows who he is because he is a walking human highlight reel. He’s just a beast. He’s the perfect college football player. Really can’t say enough about the guy. I’m going to save the Joe Milton quote until later in the season. Back to the Vols tho, feels like 98 baby.

OK State -21.5 vs CMU

Classic way to get the season going

What even is a Chippewa? Oklahoma State by a billion. I really think they may have a shot to win the Big 12 this year. They’re always the bridesmaid in the Big 12 and always getting overlooked for regular Oklahoma. Wouldn’t it be fitting that in probably the last season the Big 12 has they finally capture some of what Justin Blackmon and Brandon Weeden couldn’t and they make the playoff? Also how wild was that the year that Alabama beat LSU in the natty that Iowa State beat Oklahoma State in Ames, Iowa on a Thursday night right after their womens basketball coaching staff had just died in a plane accident. Sorry that was kind of a word vomit but that was 🅱️razy when it happened. Shoutout Iowa State. Ok State -21.5.

GUEST PICK OF THE DAY: PURDUE +3.5 VS PENN STATE

You don’t waltz into Ross-Ade stadium in west Lafayette and come out without a dog fight I tell you that. Put the mortgage on Purdue. Shoutout to the 7 total girls that attend this university.