What’s up fellas. Did you think we would leave you high and dry on the biggest gambling weekend of the year? Think again. We’re here to give you all the best picks in one place and you decide your path to follow. One of us is guaranteed to give more free cash than the other (coach), but we’re here for one reason only. To rain hellfire down upon your bookies. Let’s get this bread. Spaghetti and meatballs. Wings and pizza dip for all.

The Game

Coach’s Pick

Chiefs Moneyline.

This night ends one way and one way only. Patrick Mahomes lifting the Lombardi trophy. To bet against this man in this situation is pure anarchy and there’s no way around it. Mahomes is inevitable.

Doc’s Pick

Chiefs +1.5

I wish I could pick any team besides the teams that are playing for the soupy to win the soupy but I cannot. Therefore I am picking the chiefs. As a bama fan I gotta respect and acknowledge a dynasty and the chiefs are at the cusp of that.

Bonus pick from me is da over 47.5 points.

MVP

Coach’s Pick

Patrick Mahomes

I acknowledge our tribal chief

Doc’s Pick

I live in a state where it’s legal to gamble but only on certain things. For some reason one of those things I’m not allowed to bet on is the mvp. But if I could be on the mvp I would bet on Project Pat.

3 Best Props

Coach’s Picks

Sacks Over 4.5 – in the biggest games, and under the brightest lights, the biggest stars come out to play. These are some of the highest paid pass rush units in the NFL and it’s time for the stars to shine bright

Field goals over 3.5 – Two of the best defenses in the league, masters in bend but don’t break. Few big plays and things will get constricted in the end zone

Coin Flip: Heads – it’s time for the traditionalist to have their day. And when someone tells you “tails never fails.” You laugh in their face. Heads has a 62% chance of winning and we’re taking those odds.

Doc’s Picks

Ok things are about to get weird but just bear with me. The odds are too good to pass up.

Anytime Tuddies parlay: Deebo + CMC + Kelce + Pacheco = +1000

Spot the lie. Why would these guys not score? The only person I wish I could add is Kittle but then that’s just a lot of touchdowns to get correct. This hittin.

PROJECT PAT + DEEBO + CMC MOST RECEIVING RUSHING YARDS +1400

I mean do you think purdy gonna have more than Mahomes? Kelce or Aiyuk more than Deebo? Nobody touching CMC. This hittin.

EACH TEAM TO SCORE 1TD and 1FG IN EACH HALF +2700

This doesn’t seem that crazy but the odds are wild? I guess that means it has to hit???

I got one more for y’all

CMC + DEEBO o250 rushing yards +10,000

This is a make it all back in one game type play. Key word here is combined. What if CMC has the greatest running back in a soupy game of all time? Deebo gets one jet sweet for 75 yards? Why not us man?