Hello friends. It’s been a while. We disappeared for about a month, but now we are excited to be back in your lives as apart of your Satday morning. Lots has happened since we last spoke and lots more will happen. One thing that seems to always be true is that:
Get ready for more to happen today. We got college 🅱️oops from 11AM to midnight ish. I’m also hitting a Grateful Dead cover band concert tonight so I’m planning on using all my winnings from today for drink money at this show. Shoutout to Bill Self, I hope my boy alright. Can someone let me know what time the auburn game is today? I can’t find it listed anywhere and there’s no way Bruce Pearl would’ve let his squad get bounced already. Joey Goodman, take notes, this is how you report on college basketball.
ALABAMA -9.5 vs MIZZOU
Hopefully yesterday’s bludgeoning of Mississippi State was a confidence boost for us. We’ve been needing a get right game for a few weeks now and I’m thinking that was it. Mizzou is a better quality opponent than Ms State, albeit we were 7.5 point favorites vs the bulldogs but we giving Mizzou 9.5 points today. Really all that means is we just need BMilly to hit one more Trey bomb than he did yesterday. Easy peezy. I hate tigers.
PURDUE -7.5 vs OHIO ST
This bet intrigues me. Seems to be too easy. I think I would be more attracted to this if it was purdue -11.5. But I been listening to Never Scared by Bonecrusher today and it reminded me that I should never be scared no matter what my opps and haters say. Thank you Las Vegas for giving me 4 free points on my line. Ohio State is also on my bad side rn because of Titus and Tate getting divorced and I feel like it’s my fault. So Titus, this is MY message to the haters. I hope Ohio State loses by 1000.
INDIANA -2.5 vs PENN ST
Coach Woody got them boys hoopin hoopin. Something about Indiana being back at the top that just feels right. When the dudes in the candy cane pants run out for warm ups with a number by their name, it feels like we’re finally getting back to normal. Penn State is also a horrible basketball program. I really should’ve max bet this one but I did not. Hoosiers winning this easily.
VANDY +5.5 vs TAMU
Jerry Stackhouse’s son was on my Sunday Soccer team when I was growing up in Atl. I have no choice but to ride. Anchor Down.
XAVIER mL vs MARQUETTE
Colby Jones went to Mountain Brook. I have no choice but to ride. Shoutout to Dylan Paracka and the city of Cincinnati. Shaka Smart parked next to me at aau tournament one time when he was still coaching at VCU and he was driving a lemon. You can’t bet on a guy who doesn’t get a SUV rental car, sorry not sorry Shaka.
ARIZONA +1.5 vs UCLA
This is a really weird line in that Arizona is the mL favorite but they’re the underdog on the spread. I’m not going to lie I don’t know what that means. I think taking Arizona is the move though but we will see. Tyger Campbell is the last guy left in cbb that I played against in high school I think. We’re coming up on the end of an era.
GRAND CANYON -0.5 vs SOUTHERN UTAH
Wow this game is an all time mascot matchup. The Grand Canyon Antelopes vs the Southern Utah Thunderbirds. That is elite. I always try and bet on Grand Canyon every season because they’re really just awesome. Their student section is elite (they treat their basketball games like it’s a rave). Bryce Drew is their head coach, brother of Scott Drew the Baylor Coach, and former Vandy head coach I think. Like we always say we don’t do research we just give picks. Also Jerry Colangelo, the head of USA basketball and the guy who was wrapped up in burnergate with the 76ers is the program’s biggest donor and I think the arena is named after him? All that to say I am a bit fascinated (borderline obsessed) with Grand Canyon basketball. Go Lopes.