DOC’S LOCKS: COLLEGE FOOTBALL PLAYOFF

January 1, 2024

A couple months ago this day started to take shape. After the Tennessee game I started telling people I wanted to get in the playoff so bad. Once we got there we would figure it out and I’d take our chances over everyone else. Well here we are. I got my wish. Now I gotta do what I gotta do as a fan to see this through. Take way too much preworkout. Play COD for 30 mins til I get tingly. 50 minute workout with Bama hype videos going the whole time. Close it out with Coach Nini’s gameday song. Boots and jeans —> on. Shower. Get dressed. Lucky shirt. Lucky pants. Boots and jeans. All we could’ve really asked for was a chance in this game. Now that we’ve got that, we gotta carpe dat diem. We can’t let daddy’s boy jim and his band of cheaters get past this point. Get your piss hot and do what you can do to help the Tide. Whether you screaming in the stadium or screaming on da couch, the man on the field gotta see us no matter what.

LANK

Other games we’re on:

Oregon -18 (can’t bet this bc liberty is in Virginia but this is a dub)

Tennessee -5.5

Texas vs Washington o63.5

THE ROSE BOWL:

ALABAMA alt line -6.5 +200

There’s 2 things I keep saying to myself over and over and over again. The first one is this “Remember the Rose Bowl we’ll win then, hey!” It’s literally our creed to win this game. As Rolando McClain would say “IT’S IN US BOYS”. We got one goal today. Dominate. Opening kick to the final kneel down we kickin that wolverine ass. Wtf even is a wolverine??? They don’t have a mascot in general and they’re going to compete today? Word on the street is Gavin Newsom is trying his hardest to lockdown the Alabama vote for the election this year and he is supplying a live elephant to lead the team onto the field today. We don’t like to get political here but shoutout to the tax payers of California. I don’t even feel like I need to get into the X’s and O’s here that much but that’s what this game is gonna come down to. What staff can put their guys in the best position to win this game. Michigan pulled out a struggle win against Penn State (whilst cheating) and we beat ole Miss by 2 tuds. Ole Miss just smacked Penn state. Makes you think.

I said earlier I had two things I couldn’t stop thinking about. Well here’s the other one from our dear friend Eli Gold. “And the roses in this grand ole stadium are once again crimson!” Gives me chills. Gets my piss boiling. Probably the hardest radio call of all time. That’s what we heard throughout Alabamaland when we won the 2009 natty in Pasadena. We gonna turn em crimson again today. Idgaf about JJ McCarthy or Blake Corum or any of these other jabronis. We are going to kick their ass. All of em. Up and down the field 100 yards in each direction for 60 minutes. Man I’m excited for some Alabama football. This team is so dangerous. Ripped out auburns heart. Stomped on UGA’s throat. Back to back games against #1 opponents. Not my fault they the next man on the mf schedule. LANK. ROLL TIDE‼️‼️‼️

HEY MICHIGAN

YOURE NEXT