Folks. Welcome to gameday. Got to see Ronald Acuña hit homerun #40 last night. Nats Stadium really sounded like Truist Park north it was pretty incredible. That should lock up the MVP for La Bestia. I got the ole parents in town this weekend too. We going to the air and space museum here in a little while which should be out of this world. I have to show them that I have other hobbies besides drinking 15-20 beers every Saturday while watching college football. If you have any suggestions, send them my way. In other news, I been on the verge of mental breakdown all week thinking about the tide. I think I’ve created a new weekly progression based on alabama football. It goes like this. Mopey Monday, Terrified Tuesday, What if Wednesday, Think we’re good again Thursday, Funk Em We Ball Friday. By the end of yesterday I felt like Curtis Snow.
No time to be down. The Tide needs ME to bring them energy and do all my superstitions. I can’t let them down. Spaghetti and Meatballs. Let’s get funky.
FREE SHOES UNI -2.5 vs PIZZA PARTY
ACC matchup of the day. Definitely one of the better games today too. I like Florida state here to go on the road and smash clemson. The reason I like Florida state is because I don’t like clemson. I think Dabo has jumped the shark and I wouldn’t be shocked if he starts looking around a little bit at other jobs he could take. Like I’m sure there’s a garbage route in Clemson that could use a loser football coach on their truck.
COLORADO vs OREGON o70.5
This is a lot of points but This is the year. Bo Nix has improved so much under this new offense. He’s focused. He’s having fun. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s a dark horse for the Heisman. Also neither team plays any defense. This cruises over.
BYU vs KANSAS o54.5
Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, Mitt Romney ain’t walking through that door. Over under line set at 54.5. They don’t call Kansas double nickel for no reason. 55 point day inbound for the Jayhawks. Byu will probably score too. Shoutout lyles.
MS STATE +6.5 vs SCar
Put up or shut up time for Mississippi State. If they lose this one, the seasons over. South Carolina is stuck in a rlly weird place where they’re like one degree below average. Like a thermostat set to 71. I think Ms State carpes this diem and makes it happen.
ATLANTIC HOUSE PARLAY
Shoutout our old front desk guy Brandon. Shoutout foxtrot and tiki tango; prompt and digiorno. Pour one out for the A. We got DDDD in the parlay today.
DOC: UTAH -5.5
XANDER: ARKANSAS +17.5
GARRETT: ND +3.5
Oh ya…one more thing
BAMA -6.5 vs OLE PISS
“In life, you’ll have your back up against the wall many times. You might as well get used to it” – Bear Bryant. If our backs not against the wall right now then idk when it ever will be. I need the boys to get their piss hot and turn savage mode on. I just checked my watch and it says time to sin. I hope Dallas Turner is in the same time zone as me. I think we find our footing today, blow out ole miss, go on a tear the rest of the season and win the playoff. Why do I think that? Because I ain’t never been nothing but a winner.