DOC’S LOCKS: WEEK TREY

September 16, 2023

I think I’m finally ready to move on from the Texas game. I’ve thought ab it a lot and the only logical thing to do was eat my way out of being sad. Last Sunday I ate some crabs. Never had them before but huge fan now and I feel like a pro at cracking them. Rest of the week was chicken parm burritos and pasta. Elite. Today tho, today we’ve got a feast worked up. Boston butt been in the crockpot for going on 11 hours, whipping up some lemon pepper wet wings for the afternoon, got some rotel coming along too, and finally some bacon wrapped crackers. Oh yeah, Harris teeter running the crazy beer deal this week. $20 for 24 coors banquets. In this house we respect yellow jackets. Time for aome F1 qualifying. Let’s get funky.

PENN STATE -14.5 vs ILLINOIS

Drew Allar. Enough said. Homeboy can sling it. Also I’m really just tired of Brett Bielema. This guy stinks. I miss when Lovie was the Illinois coach and he had the awesome beard. No love for Bielema. Nittany Lions might even double cover in the early slate.

BAMA -33.5 vs USF

Long week this week. Just was rlly sad the whole week thinking ab trying to cash my Milticket and getting turned away. I just don’t know what else to do besides load up my gun w Buch Shot™️ (shoutout BT). The defense is still elite. Just can’t give up field position on offense like we did last week. I’m ready to be optimistic again. No more listening to the scientist on repeat this week.

FLURDA +5.5 vs TENNESSEE

This is the Hail Mary play of the week. This game is in Gainesville, and that’s really all Florida has going for them this year. BUT Florida was also trash last year and they almost beat Tennessee in Neyland. Tennessee goes to the swamp today and can never separate. Idk if it’s gonna be bc Joe Milton can’t make passes under 12 yards or because their defense is still terrible. This might save Billy Napier’s job.

XANDERSON PARLAY OF THE WEEK

Dream Team

Guest picker of the week hails from the elite city of Phoenix. It’s a dry heat, you don’t really sweat. Which is good for him bc this man is a heavy sweater if ever there was one. BIG RICC

DERS PICK – MISSISSIPPI STATE +9.5

Brian kelly has lost the locker room. Jaden Daniels stinks. Mississippi State is much better than expected. Dogs keep it close.

ERIC PICK – KANSAS STATE -4

This is a really weird game. Kansas State should be at least a touchdown favorite and Missouri really stinks. Also this line has been all over the place. Started at -1 and got to 4.5 and now it’s settling around 3.5-4. Very curious. We gonna see what happens.

DR CARV PICK – RADO -23.5

Colorado state coach gonna learn today