Folks, happy Saturday. Happy wild card weekend. Got up this morning and hit the grocery. Got my right rice, protein pasta, and got a canned vanilla latte bc I’m trying to be fiscally responsible so I have more money to throw nukes at these wild card games and Tide Hoops. Got a bagel and dropped off the old ball and chain so I could go home and get in the lab to cook these bets up. Productive start to the day so I won’t feel bad setting the world record for colorado kool aids drank in one sitting this afternoon. I want nothing but the same for all y’all. Get the two TV’s rolling it’s a 2 sport Saturday. Put some Dead on. Let’s ride.
SAN FRANCISCO vs SEATTLE +9.5
Nobody is playing better football than San Fran right now. Meanwhile Seattle is sputtering a little. I’m also a little anti Seattle bc they should’ve lost last weekend so we could get Detroit in the playoffs. Niners have already beat Seattle twice this season, once by 20 and once by 8. Hard to beat a team 3 times. I think the niners win but they kinda squeak this out and it’s a good wake up for them to get it together a little bit before they embark on this playoff run. 9.5 points is just a lot of points for a divisional game. Seattle getting 33% of bets and 43% of money. That’s a good split and also obviously means majority of the public is on the niners but the big boys are on the Seahawks. I don’t really know about any of that but this also might be the last opportunity we get to bet on Geno and I just can’t not. Real ones remember his 656 yard 8 touchdown WVU vs RG3 led Baylor game. Bout brings a tear to a grown man’s eye. Have fun out there Geno, bc this could be it. Damn I’m emotional.
SAN DIEGO SUPER CHARGERS vs JAGS +2.5
DUUUUVAAAAAAAALLLL. To be honest this is just a which team do I hate less pick. Mike Williams killed my fantasy teams championship hopes, Herbert is probably better than Tua which is super disappointing, and Brandon Staley is kind of an idiot. Like dude just punt the ball every now and then you don’t have to go for it every 4th and 7. On the other hand, Trevor Lawrence kinda ruined my senior year of college when him and his clemson friends shit on Tua in the national championship game. Probably worst trip of my life to go out to California for that one. That’s really all I have against the jags tho is I don’t like their qb so I’m gonna pick them. Also they’re good. They’ve pretty much been in the playoffs for like 4 must win games in a row and they have an awesome head coach who calls cool plays. Think the jags win this one outright but I’ll take my 2.5 points please and thank you.
TIDE HOOPS -14.5 vs LSU
Lsu basketball should’ve been given the death penalty bc of that scumbag will wade who funneled money from the Louisiana children’s hospital to recruits. People forget brian kelly killed a kid too. Tide will roll. Not to be a homer but Bama probably the best team in the country. Nate Oats will run it up on the bayou bungles and we cover this 14.5 with ease. Brandon Miller probably outscore lsu all by himself. #BMMMDH
KANSAS -7.5 VS IOWA ST
98% of the money wagered on this game is on the cyclones. This is literally the easiest bet of all time. Kansas will shoot 70 free throws if that’s what it takes for them to cover but there is no chance iowa state beats 7.5. Also Kansas is disgustingly good. Like better than last year good. Probably the only team that could keep it within 20 points of alabama right now.