I always think these lists are silly but may as well put one together. I don’t wanna put a number on how many guys we’re gonna squeeze in here but this list will probably be airtight and I will stop when I can’t think of anymore men to get in. Bear with me as this may seem a little jumbled. Sorry if the gifs are in hyper speed. Using airplane wifi like a schmuck to publish this. Addicted to the grind.

1. Najee Harris

Bama guy also good af and Mike Tomlin loves him. Lets ryde

2. Jonathan Taylor

Prolly most boring guy in the nfl but good at fantasy

3. The King

He won a heisman and went to Bama. Debate the wall.

4. CMC

Glass bones and paper ligaments but will put up 80 points through the first 3 games before he tears his tibia and has to amputate a finger

5. Cooper Kupp

I still can’t believe I lost a bet on this man bc he didn’t thank God first when he won super bowl mvp. Still solid in fantasy

6. Davonte Adams

Vegas gonna be rlly good this year. He’s gonna have an insane year

7. Nick “full” Chubb

Browns gonna have to be run run runnin that ball thanks to Diddler Deshaun

8. Dalvin Cook

A little drop in production this year bc I think he’ll miss probably 4 games but still a great late first round pick

9. Justin Jefferson

If Kirk Cousins wasn’t a worse quarterback than Jacob Carrol (that’s niche) then he’d probably be WR1 fr

10. Devonta Smith

He won a heisman and went to Bama. Debate the wall.

11. Kyle Pitts

I fr think he’s the worst player in the league but everyone keeps ranking him high this year so I’ll ryde

12. Austin Ekeler

Gotta get a west coast rb in here to keep my street cred up

13. Joe Mixon

Hits the hole hard. Real 3 yards and a cloud of dust guy

14. JuJu

He got Kermit tossing him Miss Pigskins this year. Big year to not have a refrigerator as his quarterback like he has his entire career so far

15. Waddle/Tyreek Hill

Expect us. Tua most accurate qb who has ever lived

16. Wan’Dale Robinson

Sick name and he on ESPN rn

17. De’Andre Swift

Have you been watching hard knocks? This easy

18. Stefon Diggs

Elite QB and best WR on his team by a long shot.

19. Jamarr Chase

Bungles take a step back this year and Joey B can’t sling it to him as easy as he could + Tee Higgins gets more targets

20. Deebo

Think he may actually should’ve been #1 but I just remembered him at #20

21. Saquon

He’s gotta still be kinda good somehow

22. Jerry Jeudy

Bama. Comeback player of the year

23. Kamara

Is he gonna be able to play? Didn’t he beat the bejesus out of someone at the pro bowl? If he plays then yes

24. Josh Allen

Tall, looks good in shorts, big hands, rocket arm, is fun to watch bc he seems like a cool dude and every now and then makes a complete Jimbo play

25. Travis Kelce

He’ll be solid but not a game breaker

26. Rams defense

Aaron Donald + Jalen Ramsey + Dick Buttkiss + Jim Thorpe

27. Julio

My king of fantasy football. Not a year goes by where he’s not on my team

28. Aaron Rodgers

Loves hallucinogenics but hates vaccines. A real free thinker that can break coverages down like no one else.

29. Tua

Expect us.

30. Aaron Jones

I literally don’t know any other packers skill players besides AJ Dillon ergo Aaron Jones will have a big year

31. Travis Etienne

Don’t sleep on a jag bc they will eat you in your sleep if you do just ask Coach Nini

32. CeeDee Lamb

CeeDeez

33. Jameis Winston

Jaboo always gon ball

34. Mark Ingram

He won a heisman and went to Bama. Debate the wall.

35. Trent Richardson

Future Hall of Famer

36. Marcus Mariota

Gotta click at some point