THE RETURN OF THE CAESAR SALAD TEASER

September 17, 2023

Great day of cfb yesterday capped off with an elite pac-12 after dark matchup. Colorado didn’t cover but man that was a great great game. Double OT always moves the needle. How about The Gators taking down Sloppy Heupel in the swamp. What a game. But now it’s time for the big boys to play. Get your grocery run in early. Get your coffee run + possibly a workout in in the next hour or so. Be sure you can be comfy at 1 o’clock. Maybe DoorDash some Chinese food to settle your tummy from last night. Get ready for an endless amount of gambling website ads and an uncomfortable amount of the Manning’s being shown even tho they haven’t played in forever. Also tho, Redzone. Shoutout Sunday ticket student discount (yes I’m in grad school not a flex just a fact). 8 hours of commercial free football starts in 1.5 hours. Shoutout Carlos Sainz. Good work today chili boy. Thank you for stopping Max. Let’s get funky.

THE CAESAR SALAD TEASER

YOU KNOW IT IS. THE BEST BET IN SPORTS IS BACK. I TRIAL RAN IT LAST WEEK AND IT WON. LETS GO BACK TO BACK

BILLS -1 vs RAIDERS

There’s no way the bills actually just suck. Their defense is still very elite and the raiders have Jimmy G. I don’t think that’s quite the success recipe for Las Vegas today. Jets have a great defense and I think Josh Allen had too much fun this summer to be ready to switch it on for last Monday. This is a get right game for Buffalo. Bills by 9.

UNDER 46.5 Indianapolis vs HOUSTON

In honor of Liam Lawson scoring his first F1 points today, we going down undah. Aussie aussie aussie, oi oi oi! 2 rookie qb’s vs 2 defensive coaches. This going waaaay under. Shooeys if we win.

BALTIMORE +10 vs BENGALS

10 points is a lot of points. The bungles looked terrible last week. They lost to elves! Meanwhile Baltimore crushed Houston. I think this is a good game that we got today and I think LJ and Co keep it close. Bengals by 3.

NINERS -0.5 vs RAMs

It’s always so awesome when they come out w the big boombox

The niners are rlly rlly rlly good. The rams are not imo. This will probably be a semi low scoring game but I also think San Fran cruises to a dub. They’re very very good and will scheme Aaron Donald out of the game. On offense I don’t see the rams being able to move the ball that effectively. Niner gang.

COMMANDERS +10 vs BRONCOS

I hate Sean Peyton. I hate Russell Wilson. Mr. Unlimited Cringe is more like it. Got heem. I do hope jerry Jeudy and PS2 have good days but other than that I hope the commanders crush the broncos. Commies very underrated imo and ten points is a lot. LEHU

MIAMI +4 vs NEW ENGLAND

Expect us.

Sorry Mac. The rest of your team stinks. I’m putting my money on Donnie Tagavailoa. It’s Tua time. Expect us.