Ho ho ho! Old St Pickolas has been hard at work all year at da nawf pole. Got some fantastic picks gift wrapped and ready to ship out tomorrow for all the NBA games as well as the NFL games. Kinda awesome we get all that in one day just for being good people. All we had to do was wait until the calendar made it happen and now we just get to vibe all day, eat, drink, and be merry watching sports. Gonna be sick. But today we got one present for everyone to open to really kickoff the holiday season. This is going to be better than the scratcher your aunt puts in your stocking where you just win another ticket but then you gotta go to the gas station to cash in the ticket and then you scratch that off and go cash it in for $5 and now you got a gas station lotto addiction pretty soon you start smoking Marlboro reds unironically and just playing the scratchers all day everyday hoping for like a $20 payout. So this is better than that. At least in my opinion. But to each their own. Ok anyway time to open your present.
CAESAR SALAD TEASER
We do actually eat Caesar salad on Christmas. Last year I made the dressing from scratch. Who knew you put fish in it. Kinda whack but still delicious.
GREEN BAY vs CAROLINA o31
Two of the games best young qb’s squaring off in the Queen City. The weather there is gonna be near 60 the grease. Should feel like Hawaii for the packers. Also Green Bay’s defense is inept. I’m hoping Bryce can find Adam Thielen in some spots and move the ball down the field. Over 31 is achievable but we can’t let Lafleur get to big brain and start kicking field goals for no reason.
HOUSTON +9.5 vs CLEVELAND
Case Keenum vs Joe Flacco. What have we done to deserve this. Flacco has been kinda fun since returning to da league, but I think that stops today. He’s just kinda due for a 4 interception game and the Texans are still trying to get in the yoffs. I think they cause enough problems they keep their season alive and win outright, but I’ll take the 9.5 points.
INDY +9 vs ATL
I think Desmond Ridder is out today. Heinicke also stinks. Kyle Pitts, Bijan, and Drake London will combine for 7 touches. Arthur Smith will give a press conference saying he’s got to be better. Somehow Gardner Minshew will win. The falcons will have their season ended today. Let’s go ahead and start working on Kirby’s contract.
WASHINGTON vs JETS u43.5
This is legitimately the worst nfl game I think I’ve ever heard of. Why is this happening. Just let both teams call it quits for the season please. Fire Rivera, fire everyone else, somehow get Belicheck and hit the trenches hard in the draft. Also change the name again. Meanwhile the jets can’t be saved. They’re not allowed to have nice things. I think the only solution is to fire the entire staff, cut all the players besides Rodgers, Moseley, Sauce, and the Williams brothers, completely rebuild from the ground up. Maybe they could be better after that but idk. Needless to say this will go under.
DETROIT vs MINNESOTA o40.5
This is the game I think I’m most excited for in the early slate. It should be fun! The lions be moving the ball so nicely and maybe Birmingham AL native Nicky Mullens can throw Justin Jefferson 30 passes and the Vikings can run up the score too. Feeling good about this one.
MIAMI vs DALLAS o43.5
I’m hoping we get a 45-44 shootout in this one. I think this could be one of the best games ever played forreal. Hoping for lots of scoring and lots of big plays. I wanna see Tyreek go fast. I wanna see CeeDee Lamb get blanketed by Jalen Ramsey for fantasy purposes so maybe Michael Gallup has his one 200 yard game of the year today? That could be cool. Anyway buckle up this one is gonna be fun.