Guess who’s back. Back again. Coach is back. Tell a friend. Tell a friend that it’s time to capitalize on the grandest money making opportunity this world has ever seent because FOOTBALL IS BACK BABAY.

I hope you enjoyed your summer break. I know I did because I spent mine in Maui with all the free money I snatched up during this past year’s bowl season. But now that I’ve stocked up on the three R’s, its time to rob the book blind, and we don’t start at 1, no no no, ladies and gentleman, we’re starting at 0. Week 0 Lokks and the All Parlay. Let’s get it.

Week 0 Lokks

Nebraska vs Illinois UNDER 54.5

It’s time for Scott Frost to prove himself as a legitimate Power 5 coach. Or more importantly, it’s past time for Nebraska to prove their not a laughing stock of a football franchise, amounting to nothing more than the answer to a trivia question about the 90’s. Will they do that? No. They’re not good, and they won’t be for a while. Think about it, who in their right mind would want to go to college in Nebraska? Nobody that gives a damn about football or fun. On the other side, Illinois will be under the gut of Brett Bielema, which means there’s a good chance they will get shut out.

Hawaii vs UCLA OVER 67.5

Usually my go to bet here would be to take UCLA with the points, but then I noticed something, the public is waying HEAVY on the under here. Nearly 80% of the bets on the downside. If it walks like a trap, looks like a trap, and sounds like a trap, it’s a trap. Hawaii has a decent passing attack, UCLA last year was triple digits in pass defense. UCLA has a decent running attack, Hawaii last year was triple digits in rush defense. Chip Kelly won’t let us down here. Point. Points. Points.

WEEK 0 All Day Parlay

Ever wished a football game could last all day? Well with the all day parlay you’re in luck. We have combined a parlay together that will have little overlap and last through the whole damn day of college football so that you can ride the bus to bank all. day. long. And here we go.

2:00 ET Fresno St -27.5 Pts vs UCONN

3:30 ET UCLA -17.5 Pts vs Hawaii

9:30 ET New Mexico St vs UTEP UNDER 59

Welcome back. Chicks dig the long ball.